I can't really explain my fascination with the word YAMBAG. I use it a lot. It's an odd little word, and since it's so nonsensical it can't really be considered a curse word. Maybe I get this ability to use non-curse words in a curse word setting from my mother, who brought the phrases CRINCKLEFACE, GOD BLESS AMERICA, and OH, CHRISTMAS TREES into my life.
Next time you're driving and someone cuts you off, get a little creative and call them a yambag from the comforts of your car. Next time you feel like you've gotten the shaft from the customer service department of the phone company, shout "YAMBAGS!" over and over while you wait on hold. Next time you have a bad experience at the DMV, you can walk away muttering "What a bunch of yambags." (I gotta give a little plug here for the new Motor Vehicle Commission in New Jersey, however. The last few times I've gone in for something, I had a quick and pleasant experience)
Anyway, while driving across the country both alone and with friends, we came up with some location-specific adaptations to the yambag. Here they are. Feel free to add comments with areas I haven't covered. The only rule is that whatever replaces YAM has to be one syllable.
LOCATION --- NEW BAGS --- WHY?
Florida --- sunbags --- lots o' sun
New Orleans --- crawbags --- lots o' crawfish on the menu
Texas --- hornbags --- lots o' longhorn cattle
Vegas --- slotbags --- duh
California --- sproutbags --- they eat sprouts there
Utah --- morbags --- lots o' Mormons
Nebraska --- cornbags --- lots o' corn
That's all we came up with. I now open it up to you. Places you've lived or seen... make your own yambag concoction! Leave comments! Yambags, unite!
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2 comments:
North Carolina - Tarbags - it's the tarheel state... as one of my favorite bumper stickers explained, "If God isn't a tarheel, then why is the sky Carolina blue?"
Virginia - Hambags - The old Virginia ham. Someone thought, "ham is good, but if we cover it in sugary goo, it will be better." Just like what they do with yams when you think about it...ahh the south.
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